Divorce Without Dishonor

Many people think of divorce as a battle, and therefore the concept of SURRENDER may feel like one is giving up the fight, or giving up all hope. Sometimes that is exactly what is needed to get us past our minds, past our egos, and past our desire to control things.

The first place we need to surrender is in quiet time alone. We can turn to our higher power, and hand our control over to that infinite wisdom. Tension will begin to ease, and an underlying calm allows us to move more easily into our dealings with others.

Having already surrendered to the process, there is no need to go into battle. We can choose to look at divorce as an unknown journey that requires assistance from experts to navigate our way through it. Then we can surrender our attempts to have control over something we cannot possibly control. By partnering with people we trust to guide us through the terrain–people who will approach the situation in a way that is aligned with our ideals—we can rest assured that we will make it through in the best possible way.

Collaborative Divorce can help to shift the focus toward building something new that serves all involved.

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You might find it ironic that a lawyer, specializing in laws of the land, would want to share information on spiritual laws. But there are many laws that govern us all, from state and federal to the laws of physics, and spiritual laws are no exception. Regardless of which religion you practice or beliefs you hold, there are certain general concepts that can help you through the painful emotional and legal process that is divorce.

By beginning with ACCEPTANCE, you can focus all of your energy on moving forward. Take a deep breath and rein in all the thoughts that are keeping you in the past. Be here now. Otherwise, you will be running in circles questioning, which can keep you stuck, moving neither forward nor backward. As Heraclitus said “We cannot step twice into the same stream,” meaning that life keeps moving forward, and once the moment has passed, you cannot go back. The best you can do is to learn from what was, and use that knowledge to improve your life as you move forward.

Constantly remind yourself that everything is as it should be; that nothing occurs by accident but rather is divinely designed so that each one of us can get exactly what we need to support our own unique evolutionary process.