Divorce Without Dishonor

It happens. Sometimes even grandparents divorce. After 30, 40 or even 50 years of marriage, whatever glue that held your parents together weakens and dissolves. While a grandparent’s divorce is not as difficult for a child as his own parents’ divorce, it is still traumatic. Here are some suggestions for helping your child cope with his grandparents’ divorce:

• Keep the lines of communication open between your child and his grandparents. Try to answer your child’s questions honestly without assigning blame.
• Don’t allow your children to become messengers for their grandparents. Your child may feel he is being asked to choose between his grandparents, causing conflicting feelings and undue stress.
• Share your own grief with your child. He needs to see that it is okay to feel loss and grief so he can understand and express his own emotions.
• Don’t force your child to talk about his feelings until he is ready. Each person processes grief in his own way and in his own time.
• Watch for significant or prolonged changes in your child’s sleeping, eating or playing habits. If your child exhibits pronounced changes or frequent moodiness over time, you should discuss his symptoms with his pediatrician.