Check out this short You Tube video of the “Magic Robe” speech, by yours truly, that was made in conjunction with the Family Law Coordinators from the Circuit Court for Anne Arundel County as part of the upcoming video series for future Divorce Education and Co-parenting  programs. \”The Magic Robe\” by Mike Mastracci

Filed under: About Us, Child Access Issues, Collaborative Family Law, Custody Scheduling, Custody Standards, Healing From Divorce, Mediation Issues, Positive Parenting, Video Clips  | | No Comments »

I recently came across a good article in which my friend Deborah Moskovitch contributed in a significant way. Deborah is the author of an outstanding book, The Smart Divorce. You should check out her website at www.TheSmartDivorce.com

Typically, the end of summer and the start of school is a busy time for everyone, especially for divorce lawyers and lawyers who deal with pre-divorce and post-divorce parenting problems when parents do not agree on school related issues. So, what can be done to best protect the children from parental discord when it comes to back to school?

How to help kids cope:

The Smart Divorce author Deborah Moskovitch offers some basic back-to-school help for parents who have decided to separate in September.

Get thee to the principal’s office:

To avoid awkward moments between your child and a teacher unaware of the new family dynamics, try to eke out a moment with a principal or vice-principal, who can relay the news. “They know how to handle it with their teachers,” said Ms. Moskovitch, adding that this is crucial if pick-ups are being handled by a parent unfamiliar to staff. “Parents often change the guard at school, rather than going to the other parent’s home to pick up the children. This way, the teachers are aware of what’s happening if they see another parent they’re not used to seeing.”

Get on the school list:

If you weren’t the parent manning the school e-mail list, get your own account now, Ms. Moskovitch said. “Make sure that you get report cards mailed to you – register your second address. If there are field trips, you can put your name on the list to be one of the parenting guides. It shows the kids that you care and want to be involved.”

Homework for all:

Moving out doesn’t exempt a parent from helping the kids with their homework, especially if they’re particularly strong in a subject. “If you were married, the kids would come home from school, have snacks and maybe some playtime and then they would do their homework.” Recreate that discipline at your place.

Pass notes:

“A lot of parents use a journal that goes into the kids’ backpack as a tool to communicate with each other. It goes back and forth and they send notes about doctors’ appointments and assignments at school,” Ms. Moskovitch said.

Be flexible with visits:

Between mountains of homework and extracurricular events, your children’s dance cards will fill up fast. Wednesday night pizza may not always be an option; try a lunch on the weekend or during the week if the school allows children leaving the grounds. “The parent can’t take it as a negative if the kids are busy with their friends doing school projects or hockey. They have to be creative in how they spend time with their kids, whether that’s driving [them] to the activities or having a quick dinner.”

Have the talk – most parents don’t:

Ms. Moskovitch urges parents to speak with their children about the separation and anticipate their questions: Where they will live and go to school? “You need to give them a sense of security. If they’re already going to start the school year with a heavy heart because they don’t know what’s going on, at least you can try to minimize the confusion by having that conversation.”

What else might be beneficial? Please share your thoughts.

Filed under: Alternatives to Litigation, Child Access Issues, Communicating with Your Ex, Featured Websites, Positive Parenting, References, Resources & Books  | | 2 Comments »

Having Trouble with Shared Custody?
Are you a young single dad fighting with your ex and her mother for your rights to be a father to your child? Are you having issues trying to share custody of your child with a long-term girlfriend? Are you constantly being accused of being a dead beat dad but you try your hardest to always be there for your child? Is the mother of your children keeping you away from your kids? If you’d like to share your story with Dr. Phil on TV, please write us!

The previous paragraph is on the Dr. Phil Website and is being sent to Dr. Phil subscribers requesting the above described person(s) to appear on an upcoming Dr. Phil show.
Go to DrPhil.com for more information.
Just another public service message from your friends at DWD !

Filed under: Child Access Issues, Communicating with Your Ex, Current Affairs, Custody Scheduling, Financial Costs and Issues, Positive Parenting, References, Resources & Books  | | 2 Comments »

Mike the Lawyer asked: “So Doctor Banschick, how do you tell the difference between an upset teen and a teen that needs treatment, and maybe medication?”

Find out what Dr. Mark Banschick had to say by following the long pretty link below to Dr. Banschick’s recent Huffington Post expert article: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/mark-banschick-md/

Filed under: Positive Parenting, Teens  | | No Comments »

In 1995, local author Rosalind Sedacca was worried about how to tell her young son about her impending divorce. She came up with a way to smooth his transition: a scrapbook explaining the divorce thoughtfully.

After realizing there should be a template or model for how to tell children about divorce, she wrote a homemade storybook and made it downloadable so parents could customize it with photos and personal information.
”How Do I tell the Kids about the Divorce? A Create a Storybook Guide to Preparing your Children — with Love!” uses two age-appropriate, fill-in-the-blank templates for parents to use when breaking the news.
Her now-adult son wrote the introduction.

She is offering her special divorce advice and more for free for in July, which is National Child-Centered Divorce month. She applied five years ago to Chase’s Calendar of Events, a resource for creating special days, weeks and months, to make July a special time for parents to think about the impact divorce can have on children. The process took several months to finalize.
She also created the Child-Centered Divorce Network as a support and resource center for parents to handle divorce the “right way.”

Sedacca, who lives in Boynton Beach, is a relationship coach, professional speaker and holds a bachelor’s degree in communications.

“All couples should ask themselves this question,” Sedacca said. “Do I love my children more than I hate my ex?”
Answering this question reminds parents to remain civil and ensure their children are first priority, she said.
Another expert, Ron LaSorsa, offers advice for couples with children and whose marriages are broken. He grew up around divorce and experienced it as an adult, and founded the Kids Come First Coalition so that professionals and individuals could talk and makes suggestions for telling kids about divorce.

“The traditional divorce process has a negative impact on children,” LaSorsa said.
Some mistakes parents often make include: making the child a messenger between parents, having the child make divorce decisions, alienating the child and telling a child adult information such as if one parent is an alcoholic.
Older children especially, Sedacca said, are affected the most because they often develop resentment and anger that result from divorce.

Parents should constantly tell the child it is not their fault for the divorce, make them feel loved and use co-parenting skills.
“The problem is not divorce,” Sedacca said, “It’s how divorce is handled.”

For access to free divorce resources online for the rest of the month, visit childsharing.com/childcentereddivorce, Sedacca’s website at childcentereddivorce.com or contact Sedacca for more information at rosalind@childcentereddivorce.com. LaSorsa can be reached at kidscomefirstcoalition@gmail.com and his website is divorcecures.com.

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